What do Elvis, Oprah, Walt Disney, and Steven Spielberg all have in common? Besides fame, fortune, and mega successful careers, each received critical feedback and were either fired, rejected, or discouraged from pursuing their professional dreams and goals early in their careers.
And while their early feedback experiences might not have been encouraging, there are times and situations when feedback can propel us to success. To appreciate what feedback is good for, it helps to understand the definition along with some of its myths and truths.
BACKGROUND
Definition: Feedback is our verbal and nonverbal responses to a product, someone’s performance or behavior, or how well they’ve communicated. It is expressed through our words, tone, body language, and actions. Even receiving no response from someone is considered feedback.
Purpose: Feedback offers perspective about our talents and skills as well as how others perceive us and our message.
Types:
- Positive or Negative Outcome Feedback evaluates. For example: “Great job.” Or, “That was terrible.”
- Positive or Negative Process Feedback evaluates what does or doesn’t work and includes suggestions for improvement. For example: “That’s a good start, but can you expand on these three points?”
MYTHS
Myth #1- No One Wants Negative feedback.
Truth: People do respond to feedback that’s positive; it feels good. But they also respond
to constructive feedback that’s informative and includes suggestions, tips, and
perspectives from other peoples’ experiences.
Seasoned employees who received tons of positive feedback from their managers also
requested negative input. Why? Even though positive feedback reinforced their self-
esteem and increased their knowledge about their skills, they wanted to learn more
about their potential and areas they could develop.
Myth #2- Feedback Is Always Helpful.
Truth: Though unsolicited feedback may seem productive and generous; it can come across as judgmental and invasive — not particularly inspiring. Studies show that giving advice is empowering to those who offer it, but it may not empower those on the receiving end. In fact, they may resent it. Before expressing an opinion or sharing advice, you may want to ask others if they’re interested.
Myth #3 – Others Know Best.
Truth: Feedback tells us about other people’s reactions, tastes, or priorities, not what we’re capable of– remember the list of successful celebrities? Use feedback to gauge your impact on others, not to measure your worth or potential for success.
TIPS
Tip #1 Know your Audience
Novice employees or those with little experience responded best to favorable feedback. Experienced employees often favor feedback that supports improvement. No nonsense, logical types prefer when you’re upfront about what doesn’t work, while sensitive types like to discuss their strengths and challenges in private.
Tip #2. Language matters
Be Concrete and Constructive: Even positive feedback, if vague or abstract, might not be useful. Instead of saying “That was awesome!” try, “Here are three awesome things you did that worked for me.”
To prevent being critical or stunting someone’s motivation or creativity, offer suggestions that build on strengths and past patterns of success.
Tip #3. Set Intentions
As the Receiver: During my last semester of graduate school, I thought it would be fun to audition for a part in a play. Prior to the audition, I rehearsed with a theatre student who told me I was great but offered no other suggestions.
I was ultimately selected to sing in the crowd scenes; I was thrilled. But when I later shared that outcome with the theatre student, it was then that she told me I’d need more practice if I wanted better roles.
Since I never asked for additional feedback, she might’ve assumed I only wanted encouragement. Bottom line? Let others know the type of feedback you’re looking for.
As the Initiator: Do others want to know how they’ve impacted you, how you can help them excel, or would they prefer you not share your opinion at all? To determine the best approach for others, communicate in advance—i.e. ask questions.
Feedback is complex. There are many variables — you, others, and the circumstances. And though it may not always be understood or appreciated, when executed correctly, feedback provides valuable information that can benefit us all.